POISON

She said, "I've come from afar to love you"

Our lies that were told saved none from truth

But the damage is done and now here we are

yes the damage is done and the damage is ours.



In time you will see I'll be yours, you'll be mine.

We'll be family, strong and dedicated we'll shine

and I followed as I do, so often I'm lost

whether lead or follow, so high is my cost.



She said, "we'll make a life, here or there"

We continued to travel the maps while we share.

I'll back you up to extreme; in fact I'll own you

I'm sure that's what she means.



I invited her in, the poison and all.

The excitement, the lure, such a sultry call.

I ignored my real life, lost my real wife

sold my soul for a ticket destined to hell.



She asked, "will you go back, would she even want you"?

A sigh of relief and set...determined when I said, quietly, no.

Weak and reliant a vulnerable spirit

In darkness I stewed. Alone, still, and used.



The new and hopeful promises faded away

But I clung to the hope of will you marry me.

What would I say, in this bed that I made?

My future based on such a mistake.



With that she went home, miles and miles away.

Where her life and her new girl await.

I still had the plan fresh on my tongue.

Unbeknownst to me, I thought I was the one.



Wreckers never stay; it's the nature of the beast.

Poison leaves its mark, through each ring of the tree.

My life unraveled in an instant before my eyes

A vault was opened, the damn broke,

light came to every fucking lie.



The secrets I kept the patterns that bled.

Darkness was obscenely filling my head.

So stupid and blindly I followed this spawn

Ignorant, hurt, a fool when she had gone.



I grappled for a footing, grasping at straws

Can I learn from what I lived, what I saw?

Dismiss her last words, blatantly real

"People fall out of love every day, no big deal"



I mean so little, I stand for nothing.

The universe is now empty - all from a fling.

In this mess I cannot salvage or find

Something to hold onto, not one thing.



Once again, I sit rocking, sobbing on the floor.

Bleeding from the sharp edges of a piece of my heart.

God does not make a glue for this heart.

Mine which imploded in despair.

High velocity torched it black, sharp and bare.



It would not be fair to reach out again

not to inflict this (me), to another one

Damaged and empty I've nothing to sell

I couldn't bear to inflict this upon another soul



What is to become of me on my cross?

Ridiculed and naked, spiritually lost?

I will not find myself in another’s eyes.

I may never find myself, I may never try.



--Diva

YOU ASKED

It's more than all the time we've lost
those years we parted ways.
It's how deep the heart and holes got
Every separated day.

That I missed the sighs you breathed
for the Gods and skies relief.
And was not there to hear the
echoed tears in the rains release?

Much  more than yearning passion
Never there to fill the void.
As parched I roamed the lands
Without your liquid voice.

It's moments not recoverable for both
our hearts.... they are gone.
Those years of life we lived apart
choices of love, right or wrong.

Those became our realities
Still empty pieces remain.
Once filled by our delicacies
Now hinder many pains.

Not all is lost, thrown to the wind.
Your written word, I heard.
My small moments held to my heart
I dare not ask for more.

--Diva

REMINISCENT

I’m frigid cold

 in a bed of snow

Sheets

Alone.

Awake to glimpse

 there’s morning light

Immerse my face into a pillow

Of ease.

My childs tiny body slips in

From the cold.

Wraps her body

 around mine

In sleep.

For this we are never too old.

Her hair lays upon my shoulder

And the

Sweetest breath touches my neck

Reminding me

How she came to be

A fragile gift

My heart would need.

I can only hope I will feel this breath

Again.

Throughout my years

And tormented life

It will be my faith

And grace.

My comforting rhythm

Until mine ceases

And I die.

 
-- Diva

NEEDLE AND THREAD

Your broken heart needs mending

I’ll cradle you in the shadowed silhouettes

Of those who mock your pain.

--Diva

THE OPEN ROOM

I create my solace room


Unbeknownst to me

Seal myself in a lonely tomb

With walls as high as I can see

I feel myself enclosed and small

Although I want to desperately be free

I don’t know how to step out the door

Or walk away from this prison

That protects me.

I’m frightened and I’m lost

I have no reason in this day

It is all I have been taught

So far fear’s been my only way

I see outside my walls

Is beauty beyond my words?

It seems so far from my reach

It seems a different world

The beauty encompasses joy

And peace then love I feel.

I watched it for the longest time

From my walls

Not believing it was real.

Then without my knowledge

It crept into my room

The bliss I admired from afar

Decorated the walls of my tomb


I never gave permission

I didn’t know it was even there

Until I had the roof blown off

And sat with awe in my stare

The light brought into my life

I had only admired, never taste

But God I wish I could fill my desire

And savor every day

--Diva

ORBITING

The earth will still for your breath

The world could explode with a soft

touch of your lips

My heart stops with each sigh you

give

The moon will circle

Eternally

That you live.

-Diva

EXHAUSTED

My podiatrist would chastise me

If I had one to love my feet.

The chiropractor would scorn my acts

After he adjusted my aching back.

My sweet dermatologist would dismay

at the wrinkles created on my face.

The optrician nodded his head in shame

telling me to pick out my new frames.

My trusted beautician shook her head in disgust

at my roots and my gray that grows out each month.

I cannot even repeat what the gynocologist said

While I lay in his stirrups, his makeshift bed.

So I may need to consult a plastic surgeon soon.

To creat the new me worthy to swoon.

I'm sagging and drooping from north to south

There's cussing and cursing loud from my mouth.

Aging comes graceful...yah graceful my ass

Speaking of which I wince when I look back.

It's not for sissies, this act of ancient.

Indeed my body is very well spent.

-Diva

TAKER

I am a taker in life, that's me.
I take from others, endlessly.
Shameful and brazen I behave
Through time and life, I take.

I take the passion, often sought.
I take the pleasures, being caught.
Take the touch given me.
Take the kisses, take the free.

I take from family and from friends.
I take beginnings and I take ends.
I need this take to survive.
I breathe this take to be alive.

I'll take your smile right to my face.
I take your words with lighted grace.
I take your glances to my heart.
I take the pain of us apart.

I'm greedy...I take what I need.
I take compassion, I take the lead.
I'll take your generosity each time.
I'll take advice like nurtured wine.

I take the sun and light and air.
I take the stones and soil here.
I take this earth that's given me
I take my opportunity.

I take the comfort, I take the ease.
I take the quiet and the peace.
I take the gifts and bobbles, cute.
I take all the trinkets and the loot.

I'll take your ear to ease my grief
I'll take your heart for my relief.
I'll take your hand to hold in mine.
I'll take your lips to my divine.

I take assumptions and license.
I take common and regrets.
I take the comforts of your home.
I take you as my own.

I take your advice, right or wrong.
I take the risk in the storm.
I take abuse, I take each strike.
I take victories, I take each fight.

I take your breath and take your thought.
I take your time, take the whole clock.
I take my chances and take some dares.
I take your graciousness and cares.

Yes I was born a taker first.
I take from all like hungry thirst.
I take from light to dark of day.
I take to often get my way.

I'll take your whispers, every word
I'll take my blessings from the Lord.
I'll take your graciousness with pride
I'll take your truths and your lies.

I take the tears, the sting
I take the fear of losing
I take criticisms face
I take the pennies for the race

I take the notion and believe
There are born two different seeds.
The takers and the givers both
I take in life, I take the most.

--Diva